A Former Nun Escapes Her Secretive Monastery

Photo by Keiko Ikuchi/NPR

Catherine Coldstream joined an ancient and secretive Carmelite monastery in the UK when she was 27 and surrendered herself completely to a life of poverty, chastity, and obedience.

But years into leading this sheltered and isolated life of a silent nun, she realized the complexities and dangers of the life she vowed to live. 

On this week’s episode of Write About Now, I talked to Catherine about her experience, captured beautifully in a new memoir called Cloistered: My Years as a Nun. Spoiler alert: Catherine fled the monastery and now teaches theology at Oxford.

I found the book fascinating. It exposes a hidden world none to only a few and captures her struggle to be selfless without losing her sense of self.

During her stay in the monastery, she walks a fine line between doing what is asked of her in God's name and realizing the deprogramming, cruelty, and destructiveness of closed groups.

The book resonated with me because of my own experience within a high-control group in my teens and 20s. What began as an honest exploration to find a higher purpose in life ultimately became a cult of personality with backstabbing, fear, double standards, public shaming, and unquestioned and unchecked authority.

And this can be quite dangerous. 

In our conversation, we discuss the events that led to her joining the Akenside Priory, the process of getting accepted, what happens in a silent monastery, her views on celibacy and isolation from the outside world, self-surrender, and ultimately what led her to leave “The Life.”